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Beau Wann, Jr.

Well I'm cornfused...but that's nothing gnu...

hey Pat I finished the Dave Barry "Bad song" book....it is hilarious...It also said that give this book to someone you hate ! ! !    I hope you didnt read that part...I didnt...book is hilarious though...thank you so much for sending it.  Would you like to have it back, or want me to pass it on?

Pat Brantley (Ross)

Pass the book along Mr. D.J.  I thought you would appreciate the reference to "in the year 2525" since the song is so bad.  

Beau Wann, Jr.

YES ! ! ! And on the "Eve of Destruction"....I had the idea to write on the bad songs, and their possible meaning ! He missed some, and some he didnt like, I sorta like! I think, if you just listen to the lyrics, it's easy to come up with a "bad song" . But sometimes, the good melody outweighs it's badness.

One he didnt touch on, is the Everly Brothers "Ebony Eyes"...The lyrics are, uh, sort of juvenilish, for lack of a better word, and just downright silly! However, the Everly Brothers sang such tight harmonies, that the addage, "they could sing the phone book and make it sound good", comes to mind. They, to me, are one of the best harmony duos of all time...... Dean Martin was another that could sing anything and you'd love it. Well, if you didnt like Dean Martin, you probably wouldnt, but who doesnt like good ol Deano! ! ! Allus winos likeo Deano ! ! !

I'd be willing to bet, ol Deano could singo "In The Year 2525", and "On the Eve of Destruction" Hells bells, at the same time, and make em sound good. At least garner a top 40 spot!

I liked Mario Lanzo, but one or two of his entre's into the music whirld were questionable at best, like for example, "Valencia"...or ode to an orange. I kid you not, big as day ol Mario singing about an orange! Now I love orange juice, but I aint gonna sing about it !

There's evidence that I had a hearing problem way yonder back when..."Oh a tree in motion..." comes to mind. It wasnt until a few years ago I learned it was "Poetry in motion...". Well, an honest mistake, I have seen trees in motion, and thought they were pretty cool! Hurricane Carla comes to mind!

And I had the same problem that Dave Barry had with the beach boys "Hep me Rhonda" "since you put me down, there's been owls peeing in my bed..." Well, sure, you can understand how those lyrics sorta mix...eh? And "Shut Down", I cant begin to tell you what I thought the lyrics were, and still dont know...but dont care either. I like stingrays and drag races, so it dont matter a tinkers damn what the woids are ! ! !

Elton John is one of the worst at distorting words..."Rocket Man" comes to mind..."burning like a piece of heiringbone". Didnt know just what that meant, but went with it anyway. I thought it was just a british thing you know!

Well, like Dave said, there are lots O bad tunes out there, which is subject to whomever is listening. "I met him at the candy store...you get the message...yes we see...LOOK OUT LOOK OUT LOOK OUT...the leader of he pack, and now he's gone..."repeat a zillion times and fade...

Good ol Paul Simon..."KODACHROME..."  comeon Paul, give us a hint. I heard some one bet him he couldnt write a song using the woid kodachrome, so he did. I hope it was a nominal bet. He never said anything about it being a GOOD song, just that he could make a song out of it! 

"Listerine, Listerine, I love ya so much...but as good as you are, you just keep slappin me silly, and willy nilly, till I spit you out...etc" repeat and fade...

And a DJ's dream bathroom break song, "na na na nanana na, nanana na nanana na..." Probably one of the beatles worst forays into the music whirld, in my expert and professional opinion...

Well, for better or worse, it's our music, and for the most part, I love all the old tunes ! ! ! Cept for the Beatles! One or two of theirs is about all I can take. Their early stuff was good, but their drug induced ones, did they have to take drugs to write em, or take drugs to stomach em as they performed them... "man I wonder, still I wonder, who'll stop the rain"...

I liked Credence, but if you separate the words from the music, none of em made any sense! But like I said, you can disect pretty much anything and come up with blood and ugly.

Looks like the rain haseth returneth...oh boo...I sure enjoyed that stretch of dry spell we had. got lots o outside work done, but still a zillion more things to do. You know, if some of YOU PEOPLE, would come up here, I have shovels and hoes and hammers and drills and saws that are just made for y our hands.  OH, and some cold ones, beer, tea, and other refreshments!!

We have two single  claw footed slipper tubs, and then a walk in shower for us. I was gonna try and soak in hot water in one of them, but the tubs are just too tall for me to get into and heavens to betsey, if I should get in one, aint no getting out. Just have to take my meals in the tub, and set the computer on a tray or something....what were we thinking?  

Time to deplane...keep the sun at your six and ride boldly ride...
your frien and co-crazy person...ME 

Beau Wann, Jr.

How about a seaplane?  Hey John, thanks for thinking of me.... Man o man, what a mess...we were hammered for 12 straight hours, and now it's started up again...lordy and this is just the start of storm season.   Sure sorry I built on the beach like we did! 
If this keeps up,  our road will be gone. It's just barely there now.  It will have to dry out a week before we can get a dozer down there...I can tell you our nerves are frayed...ah great, more rain...goody! ! !  Settle some of this dust!

Here it is noon, and I'm still in my jim jams (british for jammies). Kept my clothes on till 5 am, also had my ID on me so they could identify the body should  things get really crummy.    was up all night till then, so finally changed to jim jams (sweat pants and t shirt) and tried to sleep. probably got an hours worth all told.  Wind and rain was just pounding the house and winderlights (east texas for windows).

Thought it was over, but nooooooo, here it comes again!   Watching the path ol william took, it came ashore due west, and then saw that it had missed us, then made a bee line directly at us and over us.   Dogs and cats and us are just worn out.  Hope all is ok with everyone!  Think I'll go lie down somewhere, dry.

Got a new adventure to tell yall about...RANCH HAND/COWBOY...took care of some folks cattle and horses whilst they vacationed in europe.  So maybe next time, sometime about 3 in the morning AM, I'll get chatty again, unless it's stormin...well, gee, when isnt it storming! ! ! ???

Disk jerky on the local radio station 1280 AM, at the height of the storm, (every moment was the height of the storm)  played "I love a rainy night" by eddie rabbi...if I could have gotten to the DJ I would have done bad things to him.  Wonder how he would like the taste of a trans-istor radio?

Float boldly float...

Patricia Williamson (Williams)

Fellow Waltrip Alums,

If you missed it, Channel 13 covered the Waltrip Band last week and their efforts to raise additional funds and make their trip to Washington D.C. for the 4th of July Parade a reality.  They have hosted numerous events throughout the year, but still need more funding.  Go to the Waltrip website and you and contribute for them through the "Go Fund Me" website.  As mentioned in the news story, many of these students have never traveled outside the state of Texas and it's such an honor that they have been chosen to participate in this national event.  Won't you help support them?

Pat Williams

Pat Brantley (Ross)

I went to the website and the waltrip band needs more than $120,000 more by July 3rd.  They have only raised $11,000 this year according to GoFundMe.  Is this right, Patricia?  There is no way that they are going to raise that much money.  That is really heartbreaking.  Please let me know if that was a typo.

Beau, I am sorry that Bill brought us more rain.  We only got another three inches in new braunfels.  I was looking at our natural waterfall in the ravine behind our house when the rain stopped and saw the fattest raccoon I have ever seen washing his feet.  Before the rain I walked to our mailbox (at the end of the street) and saw a beautiful large lizard.  He started moving quickly so I stopped.  He turned and I almost thought he was a horny toad.  How I wish.  Anyway, he was beautiful and I wished I had had my phone with me to take his photo.  

Johnny Sheffield

Beau

know how you feel about all this rain. 

It is flooding here right now coming down in buckets and from 

the radar heading your way.  Since last Saturday rain guage has climb to 101/2 inches of rain. 

When will it stop. Will have another week of mowing 

6 acres twice 

beau , you snd Diane stay dry there in chappel

hill. 

Hope you are doing well

johnny

Beau Wann, Jr.

  70???? HOW CAN THAT BE...oh it be brother, it be...         Hey Johnny and Pat, thanks for the well wishes...we have had almost 8 inches since late monday...Hey Pat, I saw 4 big fat toads crowded under the boys water bowl outside...they looked like horned toads, cept I didnt see the horn on their heads, just other spots...we have a real fat racoon, (well, why shouldnt he be fat, he gets fed very well, as just about everyone around the samwann hill,  he gets free corn everyday) come out and hang around  the water trough and pile of corn, along with 3 young bucks. 

The bucks are all in velvet, and growing rapidly.  some of em already 6 points and the antlers are still forming.  Every now and then, one of the bucks will chase the coon, but I guess it doesnt take it personal, cause he keeps coming back. The bucks were especially playfull today.
Cavorting in the rain, and at least 2 hours before sundown.

If we get any more hard rain, the road at the creek will  be cut in two, and cut deep, at least 10 ft down. We wont be able to get out or anyone get in, unless youre driving a dozer, or a tank.  Gonna need a week of sunshine before we can try to get it fixed!  Got a D8 dozer lined up for repairs, whenever it stops raining.  I thought we were through with the rain, but it rained all day, at least softly mostly!   Lost power for about 4 hours ! ! ! ?????  During the height of the storm, not a flicker. When the really bad stuff leaves the area, no wind, no lightning, balooie, no pawr...

Sat on the front porch watching the blue birds feed their younguns...we didnt actually seee the babies, but they must be there because the mom and pop are goin g in with food  and back out.  Blue birds are like eagles, both parents take an active role in raising and careing for the babes.  Well, the blue birds are not as big as eagles, and eagles are not blue, but they are basically the same...right????  They both fly, right ???

If any of youse youtes are interested in music, go to youtube, where you can find just about anything in this whirld and others, type in steve vai, or paganinis 5th caprice.  Those of you, and I'm one, that saw crossroads with ralph machio and jamie gertz, and I cannot think of the other lead parts name, but at the end with the guitar duel with the devils guitar player, Steve Vai, and the good guy, Ralph Machio (sp), The winning tune was Paganinis 5th caprice...There's not many folks that can do a Paganini tune justice. He wrote for guitar and violin.  Lots of really good violinists tend to shy away from Paganini.  He puts about a zillion notes a beat, and 4 zillion a bar!

Anyway, there is a young french girl, bout 14, the brat, that plays Ps 5th, and just about any other crazy guitar riff, and also one of vivaldis pieces. You really have to see her to believe it.  She is missing one thing, emotion. She acts as if she is bored.  I  can tell you if I  could play like she does, I would be anything but bored!  Anyway, also tal wakenfeld (sp) plays bass guitar with Jeff Beck...I think she is 15.  She also plays with herbie hancock and others.   wow!    Or, Orianthi, a greek goddess that plays VooDoo Child by SRV and is just mesmerizing, at least to me. (she really is from greece) although the credits say she is australian and greek...well, ok by me...she could be martian for all I care, she can play a guitar!

Oh, if you like sarah maclaglens "Arms of the angels", she's on there, with just about everyone else that does that song.  Andre Boceli, singing with just about evey great female singer, celine delon etc.  Also the canadian tenors, the celtic women, I love listening to them all...

Those that like Dire Straits, and I'm one of em, you can see the lead singer and guitar player, Mark Knofler, play with the likes of Chet Atkins and others.  You can see chet and les paul together, like I said, if you are not familiar with youtube, it opens up a great new whirld of music, at least for me.   You can listento all the old 50s doowop tunes and justabout any thing you want. old clips from the ed sullivan show of beatles and elvis and remember Gene Chandlers entrance on the show coming down the center aisle with cape and top hat singing "Duke of Earl"?

Well, wish my internet was better, I always have to disconnect and reconnect, a zillion times.  Oh, I love the Seekers, "Hey there Georgi girl", "I'lll never find another you" ,  and "A world of our own"...just to name a few! Well, just sayin...!!!  How about the Walker Brothers, "the sun aint gonna shine anymore"...Gentleman Jim Reeves...I could go on and on, and did too didnt I! Oh well, just yakin!

Ok, guess I'll sing off for now...Hey johnny, probaably gonna have to wait till it drys out, about 5 days of sun before we cut. I've lowered the brush hog as low as it can  go, so I dont have to cut so often, but then the rains come, and not only make the crud grow faster, then we cant cut when it gets wet!  Our tractor is 4 wheel drive, but I've gotten that bad boy stuck before. Luckily we have a front end loader on it, so I can generally push my way out of a tight spot!  But 4 wheel drive is as useless as 2 wheel drive when the ground id soaked like it is!  Well, duh!  I'm just yakin! 

Hey, some of youse youtes get on youtube and check the stuff out I mentioned, I'd like to know what yall think ! ! !

FLOAT BOLDLY FLOAT...
your crazy wet and moldy old frien...olbeauwannkanobie

Kay Watters '65 (Greene)

Hi Beau and all,

It has been an E Nino here in Grimes county. Several of our main roads have totally washed out as well as our private roads....mine included.  There will be repairs for us all. I have been so lucky to not have tree damage so consider myself in God's care.  Will shovel into holes and such....hopefully, it will be over?  The humidity is awful though....life in the country, erh Beau and Diane?

Beau Wann, Jr.

You are correct Kay...At least it has dried out so we can cut our fields.  Been mowing like a madman for two days. One more day to go, today, and get the last of it cut...till next time.  Had the dozer guy out to look at our road. cant do anything till the water goes down in the creek, about 14 foot deep, 20 yards wide and 100 yards long...it has gone down some, but might have to rent a gas powered pump to hep it along...

man, that sun sure looks good, and even feels good!!  Didnt have the bug problem, frog problem, bird prob lem in the big city as we do here ! ! ! Seems the bugs, frogs, and birds, want us all to live under the same roof....not just NO, HELL NO! ! !  I was trying to shoo a big ol frog offin the porch, and he turned and attacked me...I was being real gentle too, just prodding him along with a driving iron!   Shucky darn, I could have just smacked him a good one with that good ol driving iron, maybe hit him 300 yards down into the creek...how would he have liked that, huh?  He kept on trying tojump on my foot, and maybe up my leg, and bite me on the neck and kill me, or turn me into the "creature from the black lagoon" !! 

They will pee on you ever chance they get...I dont want no frog peeing on me, thank you very much ! ! !

The dadburn swallows or whateverinthe hell bird it is keeps wanting to builld nests in everything on the porches. Built one in the forks of my Harley...now, that there is sacrilege...I cleaned it out, and it was almost a whole bale of hay in there.  The birds and the field mice want to build nests in the motor of my tractor...the rabbits have had babies in my tomato plants. Dug down and covered em up with straw ! ! ! Course that hasnt done our tomato crop any good. Bout all were getting are the sweet 100s, or grape tomato! ! !  Theres also birds that are trying to build mud nests on our porches. 

Ive about had it with country critters. Might declare open warfare on em.  Nothing seems to kill the bugs. Had em professionally exterminated, also put out Demon, and diatomaceous earth, and still they keep coming. Gonna have to purchase a flamethrower at the surplus store, or napalm the place.

Maybe we'll just abandon ship, and go buy a highrise apartment. Then we'd probably get inundated with bald eagles, which I love, but dont really want to live in the same nest with em! 

Sigh...never a happy medium is there!

Ok, I'm burning daylight, gotta get moovin..."rollin rollin rollin, keep them dawgies movin, RAWHIDE...."

Teddie Jordan

Beau Ol' buddy, you made me laugh again. Look at it like this, in reality you moved into their home! Be a nice house guest.    And I know tarantulas look intimidating, but they are truly gentle giants. And there ain't nothing more harmless than a frog. They dont really even give you warts like we were told when we were wee lads. And kiss one and maybe, just maybe, you might become a prince. 

Kay Watters '65 (Greene)

Beau, this is what country life is like, Work, work, work.  I'm beginning not to want to work so hard.  Every year is a win, if you get ahead of it...I've so enjoyed it for the last 20 yrs., but beginning to dream about concrete and easy-living. At 68 you got to wonder....I don't have an old man here.  I let the birds build nests on the porches, it's so enjoyable to watch their babies fly from the nest, I've had to help a few slow starters. Bugs just come with all of it.  Wasps, wayward mice ,scorpions, a skunk or two under the house.  I just laugh at my city grandchildren and their children....they delight in seeing butterflies, doodlebugs, rabbits, etc. Have developed a true love for all my country churchgoers, I'm now one of the younger ones.  We have lost 3 members in three weeks, one a dear friend of mine at 61 yrs. so I am taking care of his mom, replacing him.  I just say "it is what it is"  a safe and quiet country life....no terriosts, Last of the good life here.

Pat Brantley (Ross)

We are at trinity pines church camp this week.  It is on part of the trinity river lake region.  When we pulled in on Sunday afternoon there were several church buses full of kids from lazy rook baptist church on 18th street.  I remembered that as being Charles brawner's church.  Then we checked in to our room and the plaque said "donated by baptist temple"; Jimmie lee's church.  I felt doubly blessed.  I may be wrong about the church homes, but I am elderly.  The food has caused some kind of inflammatory response in me.  Another friend who is here also suffers from lupus, but she doesn't have RA.  She is also swelling and breaking out in hives.  We are a pair.  The meetings are wonderful.  The friendships are long lasting and the crickets and frogs are someone else's problem.  I have an exterminator for the roaches and scorpions at my house because thst is the dividing line for me between civility and anarchy.  

Beau Wann, Jr.

YEAH BUT...I love nature, but can't I love it from just a little bit aways away???? anyway?
Long time ago, Diane and I and the boys, billy and kevin, went to the hempstead golf course, reallly a 9 hole cow pasture. Anyway, I let Diane drive the cart, well, I like to think I was benevolent with the driving chore, but she just jumped in the drivers seat, and away we went...and I mean away we went ! ! !

From the first tee off, to the green, she had a lead foot, peddle to the metal...I was hanging on for dear life, my clubs and what balls I had that hadnt been hit into the water or rough, was strewn about the first fairway, then she drives up the green incline and up on to the green! ! ! WITH THE CART ! ! ! ON THE GREEN! ! !

No course marshalls, or if there were, they were hiding from a brazen hussy just spoiling for a confrontation...Man, what a day of golf that was. We all had fun...diane had the most fun though, tormenting and agrivating me with her driving!

Well, today I put her a top the tractor, to mow the last acre, and it was golf course fairway driving all over again...the hares were fleeing in terror, bugs and frogs all running for their lives!   The little doey eyed deah never showed up for supper, nor the fat racoon......That woman is crazy ! ! !

Wow...well, got er mowed...of course now I'm 80 instead of 70! There was a time or two I thought she was gonna take out my truck, and the fence and the front porch...silly me!   I need to add a back seat, or side seat to the tractor...I told her to keep the RPM up, but not to make it fly ! ! ! But fly she did! !  At one time she was bouncing high off the seat...bout gave me a stroke...fortunately if she had fallen off, it would have shut down immediately! I guess they have that feature for the "little old lady from Pasadena" or Chappell Hill...

I'm a nervous wreck...been drinking since sundown, and wish I'd started before then! ! !  Several beers and a  couple of Jack on ice, and I think I've calmed down...somewhat!  She's already in bed sawing logs, and I may never go to sleep again for fear I'll dream she's chasing me with the 3016 Mahindra, only it will be an oversized combine!   Or a tank!

I notice, as I sit on the porch, the country side seems a tad quiet. Usually the crickets and frogs are dueling for who can produce the loudest and most annoying sound! ! ! Then the cows and donkeys in the pasture behind and on the side of us kick in, and I just know they are singing "Louie Louie", or "Twist and Shout"...

But tonight, they are silent! ! !  Alls well that ends well...oh well...what the hell...kiss and tell...ring the bell...run pell mell...a mind is a terrible think...

Beau Wann, Jr.

T J.... ! ! ! !   I was a tad tired last night, and it didnt register what you said about  T-A-R-A-N-T-U-L-A-S, god, I hate even spelling the T woid, let alone saying it, or, heaven forbid seeing one of the, what did you call them?
GENTLE GIANTS????    Oh man...pssst, hey Fran, is good ol TJ getting enough potassium? Check his electrolytes, people get really cornfused and at least act like two are t hree of the 7 dwarsf, you know, dopey, daffy, silly...

Yeah, TJ, gentle giants you say, misunderstood, maligned, a really sweet group of arachnids....yeah,  I can hear um singing now, that timeless classic by Credence, I think it was Credence, "oh lawd, please dont let me be misunderstood'...yup, think I'm gonna go rat out and adopt a few of em and send em to college...I just know they will be a big hit with all the lovely coeds....

Maybe they can form a band ! ! ! or hey, be in the marching band, they got 8 legs and 40 fingers and toes, why each one could be a whole section of drums and trumpets and trombones and saxes, yeah, cept Ts aint got no lips, they have FANGS ! ! ! !  What a sight that would be at half time...all them misunderstood A rach nids marching around on the field...wouldnt be nobody in the stands or on the field...

Ok....had to turn on the ceiling fans on the porches to keep the sweet little boidies from building nests...

Oh, about toads...my darling wife suggests we build them "TOAD HOUSES"....yeah, that's what I thought too!  If I build houses for the toads, am I gonna have to build houses for every other creature as well???? Why dont we just vacat the premises, and go stay at a motel and let all the little darlins have this place...hmmmmmm????

she said she saw the idear in one of her gardening magazines...just get a few clay pots and bust the bottom out, I thought that was the only kind they made, at least mine all had the bottoms missing, anyway, bust the bottom out, turn em on their side and anchor em down with doit...well, if it will keep the litttle peein darlins off the porch, then I'm gonna do it. Shucks might as well, already got rabbits livin in mah garden, along with the assorted crickets, grasshoppers, stink bugs, boids and arachnids...whats a few more toads...

My family, a few toads in there as well, said I'd end up in the "BUG HOUSE" someday...guess  they were right! ! ! !

I'm gonna be at Fudds next time, TJ, dont bring no lovable gentle giants...you know I'm armed to the teeth, if I see one of em, I'm gonna shoot first and not ask questions later...I can see the news now..."shooting at Fuddruckers. lone gunman shot and killed a family of GENTLE GIANTS, for no apparent reason...perhaps it was road rage...no wait I think it was a hate crime...film at eleven" 

I did shoot one of those lovable little guys with my .45.   Well, I had no choice, didnt have a hoe or shovel to bash em with, so used the next best thing, my .45 ! ! !  If it had gotten on my boot, I woulda had to shoot myself in the foot...gladly! ! !  Wait, would being shot by a .45 be worse than a bite from a T spider??? Man, that's a hard one...

Ok, enough on the T rex Spider...I  could use some help today, if any of youse youtes want to come up. Need to wash my truck ! ! !  NO? Well, that's ok....I dont think we have a car wash in brenham, I know we dont have one in CH...Oh well...the problem is, I have no garage, yet, and no trees around the house for shade...water drys up pretty quick when the sun is out!

Ok, time to go drain the rest of the coffee out of the perker...found a new coffee company, Independence Coffee company....They have numerous blends, you know froo froo types, pecan, peach, juicy fruit, and then a couple of straight blends...the two I like are "JET FUEL" and  "JACKHAMMER" ....Both of those will get you moving if nothing else will.    I buy em at HEB...so if youre in one, check em out..."Jet fuel" is smooth, but "Jackhammer", well it lives up to it's name...

"TJ, COME TO THE FRONT, TJ?

singing off now....
Your frien and "Mental Giant (case)...olbeauwannkanobie

Bill Traill

Beau, When I was back in Texas for 5 years, I learned something that will help witht he barn swallows. If the porch area has ledges where they might want to build that darn mud nest of theirs, place a rubber snake. I am not kidding ! That stopped the nests for me. Also if you start getting invaded with bees trying to build a nest, paint the ceiling pale blue ( like the sky ). They don't like that !

Teddie Jordan

Thanks for the idea Bill, I'm already scheming about a remote control that I can rig up to get that rubber snake to drop off of the ledge about the time he walks under it and flop on his neck!

And on the sky blue ceiling you see that a lot on old houses with the big front porches, and it works on yellow jackets too.

Gotta go, Beau keeps calling me up front to sack groceries on the P A system, using my old nickname at our high school grocery store job!

Beau Wann, Jr.

Thanks Bill, going looking for a rubber snake tomorrow...TJ, COME TO THE FRONT, TJ?

I'd shoot up the house if a snake, rubber or otherwise, should land on me....no way hose aaaaa....

TJ, COME TO THE FRONT, TJ???

Terry Jones (Gallemore)

Blue sky ceilings on the old houses were there to 'keep the haints away'...they apparently don't like the blue either!  Lol

Beau Wann, Jr.

Staring into a beautiful sunrise this morn !  Been waiting for it all night !  First light is about 5:30 or roundabouts thereof!   Just dont like the night...not afeared, just dont like it !  Can't get diddlely squat done, cause ah caint see diddlely squat ! ! !      Well, we here at CHIMACS, (Chappell Hill Inteligent Meteorological and Corn Pone Society) have been ushered into the twenty foist century with an all gnu weather measuring computer...The last major storm, "William" that roared through here bout sent the old system back from whence it came, the 19th century !     I'm shure yall all remember what the old one looked like as pictured below:

The gnu one, was a gift to this old weather hack for Birthday/fathers day,  from an anonymous source, Billy Joe Wann, who shall remain unnamed at this writing ! ! !    You might say it has ushered in a gnu dawn on meterology here in fly over country, Chappell Hill, Tx...Pictured here below:

   here,

and here...

It is so cool. I would have never bought anything like it, because Of all the tired and true methods employed by this old weather hack, like first determinging whether the wind is blowing by wetting your index finger, sticking it into the air above your head, then measuring the velocity (how fast the wind is blowing) by spitting into the direction of the wind. If  the test spit lands on your boots, it is a light wind, if it lands on your pants, it is a moderate wind, if it lands on your shirt, it is a heavy wind, if it hits you in the face, better get the hell inside!

This new system measures everything inside and out!  I dont know why I have to have all the information, I just do!  Now I dont need the stoopid TV at all. Only reason I watched the gnus in the foist place, was for weather information,  and those folks are idjits anyhow!  It is a computer in it's ownself, and I can hook it up to my laptop, and "LOOKOUT"! ! !
I'm big and bad and nationwide...

Well, not bragging, just thought I'd share with you Chappell Hills new weather station!  If you need to know what the weather is doing up here, call me, or send an email or text me, and we here at CHIMACS will most certainly be glad to impart all the latest information as it appears here in Chappell Hill, Tx. 77426...

Now on to other things !  The Chappell Hill annual Fourth of July Parade here in Chappell Hill, Tx 77426, will be held this year, on July fourth, as scheduled.   Last year we had 80 entrants, and 80 kazoo players (this is not a joke) I certainly wouldnt joke about a thing like Kazoo players.  I missed the parade last year, so I'm not sure if it had 80 entrants plus 80 kazoo players, which in Oak Forest Elementary school math would be 160, or if the 80 entrants also played the kazoo, which would mean there were only 80 in the parade! Of course the new political math would make it 160 even if only 80 were in attendance.  I guess you could call the 80 a trans-160....

My beloved and I have signed up to ride on Pegasus in the parade, and I think Diane will also double on Kazoo, so she can either count as two, as in the gnu math from the politicians, or as one as in the regular old math from Oak Forest ! ! !  Either way, a good time will be had by all.  They tell me that the Parade will last about hmmmmm, 5 minutes, give or take a megaparsec! So I suggest if you plan to attend, come early to get a good seat along main street.  And for goodness sakes dont fall asleep or blink or you will miss the whole thing and have to wait till next year to see it.........There will also be vendors of all sorts, so bring plenty money, cause things aint cheap here in Chappell Hill, Tx. 77426

Ok, I have probably used up my allotted time here on the forum, so I will be signing off...
From the CHIMACS weather station here in Chappell Hill, Tx 77426....Good day ! ! !

Beau Wann, Jr.

HEY TERRY, seems like I'm not the onliest (east texas for only) that uses the woid "HAINTS"(east texas for otherly whirld spirit) ! ! !       Haint, is also another excersize in measuring whether the wind is blowing, and the velocity (how fast) at perzactaly the same time...If you are outside, and you have hair, and it is standing straight out in back of you or in front of you, then the wind is blowing pretty hard.  I of course, dont have that problem of wind in my hair. Seems the wind took it away sometime ago. All the better now, dont have to waste money on "Aqua Net" hair spray! 

Now to measure "Haint" in wind velocity, you stand out in the middle of somewhere, or nowhere, preferably outdoors, and if something unseen is moving you around, it is either the wind, or a "haint"... if it aint a haint, then it's the wind....if your hair, and I  cant use that one, is not being blown about, then it aint the wind, it's a haint....in eyether case, it probably isnt safe to hang around wherever you're hanging around...so, catch the first thing smokin back to wherever you came from, in hopes that whatever it is doesnt follow you...cornfused??? Welcome to my whirld...

Beau Wann, Jr.

There's been a suggestion dropped into the "suggestion box", that we change the acronym, CHIMACS, to CHIWACS, as the M word, meteorological, is long and difficult to remember how to spell without having to consort with ol Mr Webster of Funk and Wagnall fame...So we will be changing the M word to the W word, WEATHER....WHETHER ANYONE LIKES IT OR NOT... From the CHIWACS weather station in beautiful and thriving Chappell Hill, Tx, 77426, your old weather hack, singing off oncet again..... good day ! ! ! !

Jackie Crowe (Finch)

You go BroBeau with your CHIWACS! 

It's ironic that at our Crowe family reunion last weekend swallow nests were discussed.  One of my cousins was telling her frustation with swallows building their nests on her front porch right over her entrance door.  She said they make a big mess and she keeps knocking them down, but they just come right back.  She was given the same solutions --- paint the area light blue, they think it's the sky and won't build and/or try a rubber snake.  Hope it works for both of you.

Hugs,

J

Beau Wann, Jr.

Jan, thanks for thee info.  We are still going to paint the ceilings blue, mainly because it seems like a good idear, and that is my favorite color, plus, it's my favorite color...except when another color is my favorite like black and chrome, or a red corvette!

Turned the fans off for a while, and when I turned them back on, the porch was showered with sticks straw and all sorts of debris.  Do they build at night?  I'll just leave em on durning the day, and turn em off at night unless I'm under em.

HEY JOHN...just call me caitlan...chita aint so hot...well, maybe she is and maybe she aint...maybe she's a haint...eyether (british for either) way...oops, brain just quit ! Been saying it all along, a mind is a terrible think ! ! !   Lovely Chita meeta maid...

Oh yeah, back to thee official Chappell Hill, Tx. 77426 weather station, it's an ACCU RITE, whoever in the heck company that is.  My son, Billy Joe, who shall remain anonymous, bought that for me for my birthday and fathers day. Dont know what possessed him to do so, I've never expressed a desire for one of those. In fact, I thought they were silly and a waste of money.  HA...how I've changed my tune since Mr Anonymous set it up for me.  

Ive always been interested in the weather  because my career as a (fill in the blank) was generally outside. I needed to know if it was going to rain or be cold or hot etc, to wear the coresponding and appropriate clothing......

But this WS (weather station) is cool. It gives the average everything for the day, for the week, for the month, for the year etc.  Not that that is relevant to anything, but it is still cool...except when it's hot! ! !

Most of the things it measures,  you can do by hand or manually! Like stick the ol wetted fanger (east texas for finger) in the air to see if the wind is blowing and from which a way !  And if the rain fills up  a bucket pretty quick, then it has rained alot. If no rain is in the bucket, then it has not!   And also true with the temperature, if you go outside nekid (east texas for nekid) and your hot and sweaty, then it's HOT, and probably in the summer.  However, if you go outside nekid, and you freeze and have to dance around, then it's cold and probably in the winter...see how all that woiks?

Of course you probably wouldnt want to do the cold weather nekid test up around where WTL spends his summers...they're subject to not find you until the sprang (east texas for spring) thaw...

Ok, it's saturday and I had so much planned to do, but now I've been attacked by the lazys, so I'm ddoing nothing, at least for now.  guess I'm still tired from cleaning my truck for 4 hours yesterday.  Almost got through with the vacuuming, when the vaccuumm cleaner burnt up!  Aint that always the way it goes.."pave paradise, put up a parking lot..."

Made breakfast tacos this morn...mine are the best in the entire whirld...also fixed the boys each an egg and some sausage...They always know when it's saturday and sunday...Pavlov and pavlov Jr...

Singing off now, from beautiful downtown Chappell Hill, Tx 77426, your lovely trans-weather person, olbeauwannkanobie....good day ! ! !

Beau Wann, Jr.

Hey Jan, we love your porches, and the doors are beautiful...love the texas star motif...

I knoticed that your blue, is sorta greenish...maybe ifin we went with a paler blue, that that might woik...hmmmmmm?  what if we painted the sun in there too, and a few clouds...yeah, that's the ticket..now if I can just find a Michaelangelo to hep us out....