Beau Wann, Jr.
Good Morrow mine goombahs...Anyone remember where the term "goombah" originated from? Probably some early comedy show on one of the two stations we had "back in the day" eh what! Lots O goofy words and phrases have come and gone, and most of em seemed to have escaped me at this very moment. One of those "senior moments" ah suppose.
Had the most interesting offer on the "little red trailer that could" yesterday. A lady, well, a female type person, dont know if she was a lady or a madam or Ms or Mrs...Probably a Ms, judging from the offer....OH NOW CUT THAT OUT...it wasnt THAT kind of offer...Pulease...get your minds right will you!!! Ok, now where was I, oh yeah, the offer from the mysterious lady...she was pretty, however, but I'm sure her intellect was just as nice too...
She had heard my conversation with one of the other "dealers" at the antique mall about "the little red trailer that could" being for sale...
Lots of folks come in and ask if anyone wants to buy this or that, and management announces over the speakers, sometimes if it is good merchandise, just what is being offered...some lady brought in a delapidated old cardboard box with what appeared to be an old french phone...she said it came out of a "house of ill repute" in paris...Me being an expert on phones and just about anything else, laid a scrutinizing eye upon said object...
HA !!!! Says I to meself...a fake, forgery, a phoney phone...the tell tell tale was of course the logo on the bottom...
RADIO SHACK and made in Korea...thanks but no thanks...some folks seem to think everyone is as stupid as they are...
But, that wasnt the interesting offer on "the little red trailer that could"....the mysterious lady, madam, miss, ms, from the far east, or maybe far west, or coulda been far middle...north? south? anyway to make a short story EVEN LONGER...she enquired as to my asking price to which I responded, X..."Hmmm" says she! "I just happen to have something a man of your stature, a man of the whirld, just might wish to possess, a full mount WILDEBEAST that I would like to sell or trade, and your trailer sounds like a good swap".
"A what"???? says I. "Did I hear you correctly, a full mount WILDEBEAST" I asked. "Why yes" she says, "A full mount WILDEBEAST"..."They are rather expensive to full mount" she continued. Yeah, I'll just bet they are, and dangerous too. How many people does it take to hold one of those bad boys whilst some fool sits on top of it?
"No", she laughed. "This one was shot on safari, then stuffed and mounted" she continued.
"Do you have it with you" I asked? "No, as you can imagine, a full mount WILDEBEAST wont exactly fit in the standard automobile, so I will have to borrow your trailer to fetch it" she says.
You know, just last night I went to bed thinking about owning a full mount WILDEBEAST. Same thought popped into my head at first light today. Been a dream of mine, having a full mount WILDEBEAST somewhere in my home. Preferably in the entry hall, to greet guests, or scare them away, whichever comes first. I just know my lovely beloved wife, Diane Elizabeth shares that same dream...
Man, I'll bet that would freak out all the cats in the house...I can just hear big Oliver now..."yo dude, whered the full mount WILDEBEAST come from"? or words to that effect...
"Ma'am" says I, "as much as youre offer intrigues me, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to pass". "this is a once in a lifetime wonderment" says her..."Yes, you are correct, but sometimes not all dreams can be realized" I added. "Well ok," she says seemingly disappointed, and turns and vanishes just as she appeard...an apparition, nay, a dream..."is all that we see or seem, but a dream within a dream" (EA Poe)...
Man, I really should have jumped at that bargain, but the deal breaker was taking "the little red trailer that could" to fetch the full mounted WILDEBEAST...oh well, my life long dream of owning a full mounted WILDEBEAST was almost a realization...and truth be known, I was really wanting a LIVE WILDEBEAST to inhabit the cement pond...
Well, all's well that ends well, I sold" the little red trailer that could" last night. Gave the money to my beloved to buy some more shoes...we are only knee deep in her shoes, might as well get some more...
Still have that cute cuddilwie wittle puppy up for adoption... she is sooooo cute and sweet...oh my...youse youtes are missing out on a good thing. In fact, I will go so far as to say she would make a great Therapy dog for our reading program. Maybe I'll keep her! I think Big Oliver would like tohave her. He hasnt chewed off a leg yet, but he has licked her and groomed her fur. She probably thinks she is a cat now.
Well, "sleeping beauty" my beloved, is awake...time to roust the chef out of his slumber and prepare breakfast fit for a princess...
DOD
Post Script: The above account of one of my...er encounters with life, really did happen and is verifiable through seance with King Malcom of Scotland, or my beloved wife Diane Elizabeth, they were both present and accounted for.
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