| 03/17/10 12:23 AM |
#2388
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Beau Wann, Jr.
Goot EEfening myne ramalamians, Sorry I been off the forum! Been out of town, as in not in town, as in not home!!! After myne sojorn into the unjustice system, I needed to get to the country, and to the country I did get!!!
Glad to hear Lynns wife Pat is doing ok!
Just got back in to H town from Normange in the high country, and what do I find!!!! Someones been tamperin with the time system!!! I HATE DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME!!!!! Daylight savings is not valid in the country!!! I have no clocks there, no TV, no internet, no email, no nothing electronical or digical, i barely have electrical lights!!! When it gets dark, you go to bed, when it gets light, you get up and get to work!!!
Me and Coop went by ourselves either last thursday or friday! Left John Boy with DW to protect her whilst I was away!!! If some idjit moron was to actually try to mess with DW, ol John Boy would eat their eyeballs out and then hurt em real bad! He loves DW!!!! Me and Coop went into town the first day we were in the country, and got supplies ie food and drink and dessert, and visited the M and M feed store and the Hardware store! Its a good thing to make a list of things, especially if you have to go into bryan or College station, or Madisonville! Bryan has the most stores and is more better! Although Madisonville has Buccees!!!
Had to get a couple of screws at the Normange hardware, total of .22 cents! Then visited M and M feed store and get the lowdown on whats been going since the last time I was there! Lots of rain in the area, duh!!! One of the patrons, Earl, said his kat had kittens, and didnt I want some!!! Uh...not just no, shucky darn no!!! I love em, but already got my quota O kats and dawgs!!! If we lived there, I wouldnt mind a couple o barn cats to help with any of the meeces that might come a callin!!!
Ed Johnson said his dawg had puppies and didnt I want some!!!! UH...GUYS...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I can tell I'm gonna have to quit hanging around the feed store! But they do have a table and chairs for us old codgers to chew the fat!!! I think I am the onliest one that doesnt chew terbaccy or dip snuff! Nasty stuff that!!! They also dont make as good a coffee as I do, but I dont want to hurt their feelings, so I just grin and drink it!!!!
Lots o horses and cattle for sale! Dave Lee says he gots lots o spring calves and goats and just about any other livestock I might want! I keep telling them, I'm not ready yet, Still have to fence in the south pasture, and just not ready yet! Need to do other more important work first!!! Like, move the south gate in about 16 feet, and put in a north gate, then have several loads of crushed stone brought in, and build a larger barn, etc etc etc...
Friday, after my visit to the feed store and hardware store, went to Brookshire brothers for some food and beverages! For a small town, their prices are pretty good! You can get some bargains on stuff! They even have a wine and beer alcove! The store is about the size of my house, but I like it! I got all kinds o great eatin stuff, and all of it bad for me too! Oh well, who ya gonna call??? Bein in the country, cancels out any bad stuff that you eat!!!
Ol coop, aka goober, slept the whole time I was in Brookshire brothers! He did go in the feed store with me though! Them ol boys there, like him alot! I guess, cause he doesnt do anything, but sit and grin! He will eat your donut if you let him! He pretty much stays out of trouble, he kind of leaves that dept to me! He did lick a couple of the deer blocks! Jim Bob told me if he did it again, I was gonna have to buy em! I think he was just kidding, but I didnt need half dozen deer blocks, Sooooo, me and Goober decided to head on out! Thanked Jim bob for the coffee and conversation and donuts and off we go on our appointed rounds!
Waved goodbye to downtown Normangee, and headed back to Whiskey River Ranch (the name my son named the ranch)! He also has several internet mail order companies, of which one is named Whiskey River Tactical, www.whiskeyrivertactical.com, and www.whiskeyriverranch.com, and also his mainest company, www.bayoucityhardware.com! Best prices on hardware you can find! Guess I got sidetracked there, Me? Nah, not me!!!!
So me and Goober get back to the ranch, and the place is just soaked from all the rain we have had over the last cou;ple of months! At least 6 inches of water at the south gate! Had to back up into one of Mrs Perrys driveways and get a running start, so I didnt get stuck! unlocked the gate and swung it open, and got back in the truck and took off, and slid through the gate and went sideways down the road! Finally got er under control, and stopped on a high dryer spot, and got out and walked back to the gate to locker down for the night!!!
Drive on up the road, turned left at the gas tank and around behind the barn, and over between the two trailers, and closer to the big one than I did earlier! That ol ford truck, sank like a stone in that soft earth! I said, "oh no" and "goodness gracious", things like that!!!! Seems my front wheels sank into the trench where we ran the water pipe last summer, and the back wheels just started spinning! Truck sank down to the axels!!! I could not believe it! I hate being stuck, like anyone really does, duh!!!!!
So, after I teach Goober some new cuss words, I get out and unload the groceries! One good thing, ol coop didnt have as far to jump down out of the backseat as he usually did!!! I didnt even have to get the stool for him! Put the groceries away, and coop jumped up into the trailer and promptly went to sleep on the couch! I swear, that ol boy is just a ball of fire sometimes! why, he went right on in the door, and up on the couch and was snoring before I got the groceries put away, and got a pot of coffee started! (Got to have my coffee)!!!
I grab a shovel from the barn, and start digging the mud out from around the wheels, and put some bricks under the back wheels! I cranker up, and one back wheel just spins, and slinging mud all to hell and gone!!!! It aint movin! Oh great, guess I aint gonna go to the dance tonight! (There is no dance, that I know of, but it sounded good) So here I am, stranded in the middle of nowhere, stuck in the fershlerginer mud! Truck stuck in the muck!!! DW and Kevin are not slated to come up till Sunday afternoon! Its not a good feeling, knowing I am not going to be able to leave when I want! Isnt that something??? Here is a place I want to be, but now that I am here, and CANNOT leave, I get panicky! What If I get sick, or have a heartattack, or something???? I'm just out o luck!
Give DW and Kevin a call and inform em of my perdicament! Kevin being a Dodge guy, was just giving me all kinds of grief for having a ford! So, here I sit, got a fire going, and a good cigar, and some Gentleman Jack on ice, and my faithful companion Goober! What more could a man want, eh??? The wind was just howling all day, and come dusk, it is as still as Goober sleeping on the couch! So, me and Goob chilled out by the fire, and watch the stars come out and wink at us! My ol truck looked like a lowrider there in the firelight!!! Damned old stinky ford piece o junk! Long about 8 or 9, me and coop repaired to the trailer and closed up the mountain!
I popped a DVD in the player and watched The Magnificent 7 for the umpteenth time! STarted on "Support Your local Sherrif", and fell asleep!!! Had the sound turned down, and just read the closed caption, so I didnt know I fell asleep, until Goober started snoring, and running in his sleep!!!! Dawn came early!!! (dont it usually???) Me and Coop got up and I fixed us bacon and eggs and grits and biscuits and stuff! Ol Goob sure is attentive when it comes to bacon and eggs! Hells bells, me too!!! After breakfast, me and me sidekick, go off on fence patrol! Big tree was knocked down in the storm on the east side of the place! Fell to the fence, but not on it! Whew, that was lucky!!! Gonna have a lot of firewood for next winter!!!
Checked the feeders and cameras, everything cool! lots o deer and hog tracks and coons and possums and armadillo! Me and goober were priviliged to watch Mom and Pop redtail hawk soaring and looking for food! Then some ugly crows came into the picture, and started harrassing the hawks! Sounds like a mismatch to me! they were wanting the hawks to fly back to the nest, so the crows could eat junior or an omlet if junior hadnt hatched yet! Or at least that was the only reason I could think of as to why 3 crows would attack a hawk, since the hawks had nothing in their talons! A crow will harrass a hawk if they see he has dinner on the table so to speak!!!
But this time they were empty taloned! Me and coop just marveled at the aerial show! One of those crows was getting a mite close to one of the hawks, when he dove into and tried to peck the hawk! That ol hawk, turned upside down, flying at mach 1 mind you, and snatched that crow out of the sky with his razor sharp talons! Thatll learn them crows some manners, for sure!!!! Me and ol coop just cheered! If the hawks didnt have dinner for junior before, they do now!!! Looks like them ol hawks will be eatin crow, so to speak!!!!
I woulda blasted them crows to hell and gone, if I could a got a clear shot, and not endangered the hawks, but, coulda woulda shoulda!!!! It turned out ok, at least for the hawks anyway!!! Me and coop walked down to the south gate, across from Mrs Perrys, and decided to walk down the road, since we couldnt drive down it!!! Mrs Perry has cows and horses, and donkeys and mules etc! she has two Golden retriever puppies and a couple o cats, and a yippy yappy dawg, that I only heard and didnt see! Oh, and the old goat has some goats too!!!
Me and Coop was standing at her fence, and there was one of her mules just standing there looking...like a mule, I guess!!! So I leaned on the fence post, and said hello! (if leon can talk to a mule, so can I) The mule didnt respond, which I thought rude!!! So, I said hello again, and then just decided to talk about the weather, and the fact that my truck was stuck and what we had for breakfast etc! Still the mule said nothing, just sorta stared at me! Kinda the way Coop was staring at me...incredulously!!! Now Ol coop was just sitting in the road next to me and looking up at me with a queer sort of look, like I have lost my marbles! Yeah, I probably did lose em, somewhere in the mud that was holding my truck hostage!
So, I am carrying on quite a lengthy conversation withthe stuck up mule, (you do that in the country, when there aint no other human to converse with)! Bout the time I'm telling the mule about my aches and pains, out comes Mrs Perry! "Say boy, are you talking to my mule"??? she says kind of sassy!!! I thought for a minute, and decided I'd tell her the truth, "No ma am, I'm just talkng to myself" I lied!!! "Well, it shore looked to me like you was talking to my mule" she insisted!!! "Now, that ol mule dont say much, especially to strangers, and they dont come any stranger than you" she cackled!!! "you and yore dawg ever come across that pig friend of yourn" she asked!!! Before I could come up with something clever, she added, "Boy, if you aint Dr Doolittle, yore a close second" she cackled! "Like I said before, you shore make friends easy dont you" she continued! "wont be long before you'll have a passel o friends out here" she cackled some more!!!
"Ifin you get that ol mule to talk, ask him where he hid the harness" she said almost in hysterics!!! I sure am glad she was having fun at my expense! Glad I could brighten someones day for em! She turned to go back in the house, when she turned back around and said, "why dont you see ifin you can talk them chickens into laying more eggs for me"!!!!! (Say you old bat, dont you have a bible to read or something)? She opened the door, and gave us one last glance, and said, "oh, the mules name is Francis"! This of course brought howls of laughter from her and the chickens and Francis! "Coop, if you make one sound, or look at me and grin, I'm gonna put hot sauce on your dog biscuit"
Well, time passes, and I mowed part of the south pasture, and cut down some more of the mean hateful mesquite trees! Man, those thorns are viscious!!!! Seein as how I was captivated, Kevin and DW came a day early! they were worried about me! I already had some chokers and shackles hooked to the back of my stinky old ford, waiting for Kevin and his dodge! He and the kids pull up, with DW rat behind em! Brought me a big ol fine burger and fries from K and T grocers, beverage barn and filling station!!! Those burgers are GREAT!!!! So, after the burger, I hook up ol blue to kevins dodge, and we both get in! Not in the same truck, but both trucks! Kevin pulls the chokers taut, and I put er in reverse, and off we go! That ol dodge, pulled me out with the greatest of ease! Kinda like I wasnt stuck at all!!!
Boy, I'll never hear the end of that! If obumer hadnt bought chrysler, I'd trade my ford for a dodge! I'm due for ssome new tires, think I'll get some with some teeth on em, or at least some mud treads!!! We did a lot of work! Haley and her friend Anna drove the carry all golf cart all over the ranch honking the bicycle horn I put on it for haley! I'll bet they put a hundred miles on it whilst we all worked on stuff!
DW and Kevin and the kids left the next day, but I stayed till today!!! Me and Coop got in early, and of course he was worn out from sleeping all the way back, so up on the couch he jumped!!! I dont know how he can keep up such a pace! DW was out at Haleys in Katy, painting her room pink! yea!!!! I got all freshened up, and hit the sack for a little shuteye!!! Woke up sometime, duh, took coop out on patrol and checked cole crick and the daffy ducks and cooty coots! Alls quiet on the western front! Took John boy next out on patrol, him and his back pack! Nothing unusual! reported same!!!
the girls surprised me, and haley came back with DW! I dont like surprises, but I love that one!!! I just love that child...oh, and DW too!!! We had some sort of pasta for dinner, and then DW and Haley whipped us up some BROWNIES...YEAAAAAAAAAA!!! I whipped us up some A number 1 coffee!!!! Ok, time to tuck my sweet darlin into bed! Gonna let her have my side, and I'll sleep on the couch with Goober! Glad to see all the folks on the forum! Paige, me and Coop are thinking good thoughts about your truck! If we win the lotto, Coop says he will buy you a new one!
Richard, glad to see you are supporting the capitalist system! Keep er going!!! Burge, glad you are healing!!! So without further adieu or aplomb heretofore notwithstanding (lawyer speak) Keep the sun at your 6 and dont be a stick in the mud, and get stuck in the mud! yore friend and brother and muddy pard beauregard
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