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Beau Wann, Jr.
Howdy one and all,
Hey RtLH, your pupppppyyy (sticky keey) sounds delightful, but what puppy doesnt!!! Doc come up with any breed yet??? part lab and part this and that???? Ol coop went from 89 pounds when we got him, to 115 pounds, that is after the vet told us to increase his food! Then of course he told us to decrease it! But coop is a couch sweet potato, and thats really all he wants to do, except to take me on walks in the rain, (sure wish we'd get some). Be careful what you wish for, Luke Skywalker, you just get it might!
Hey, I started using one of those headlamps about 10 years ago, or more!!! It all started AFTER, I fell throught the attic into the kitchen!!!! Tell you more, you say??? ok my children, Once upon a time, there was this ol boy, named sweet tater, and it wasnt for nothing he was named that!!! I, er, this other old boy, sweet tater, was up in the attic, playing TV cable installer/phone man! I was a might more agile back in them good ol days of climbing through attics! Anyway, I had a hand held flash light, and was walking the joists, pulling a cable, when I bumped my punkin haid, said a couple o new curse words and a couple a old ones, and promptly dropped the flashlight into the blown in insulation, resulting in total black out. (probably had I just said "land o goshen", than what I actually said, I might a been ok) The lord wanted me to think about what I had said, so he took the flashlight away, to give me time to reflect on my misspeakin like I had done!!!
Man, you talk about a black hole the light was still on, but not one ray was peeking out!!!! Now I am standing on the joists, head bleedin like a stuck pig, cant see diddly, or anything for that mattter. I hollared for my beloved, but she was elsewhere! Just cant count on that woman to be where I need her! I knew that the next step was either gonna be good, or I was gonna be one story below where I wanted to be! Ok, ok, stay calm, dont panic! I'm bleedin and sweatin, and hanging on to the rafters, lost in a black hole, probably wouldnt be found for a couple o years!
Ok, I can do this, and with a little luck on my side...whoosh crash bang...guess what, luck wasnt on ol taters side, or anywhere around ol sweet tater! Double dang!!!!
One minute, I was in the black hole, known as the attic, and the next, I am standing in the kitchen next to the fridge, looking like I was poised to get a beer from it!!! My beloved had come back in the kitchen to stir something in a pot she had on the stove, when I unexpectedly dropped in! "Oh hi sweety" I said, "just thought I'd drop in to see what we're havin for supper"!!! To say she is surprised, is putting a good name on it! Here was her "special ed child" standing in the kitchen, head bleedin, sweatin like a hawg on fire, still holdin on to the coaxial cable, with blown in insulation decoratin the kitchen and surroundin areas!!! I immediately went over my "LANDING CHECK LIST", kinda like the astronauts do when they touch down on terra firma! Ok, legs ok, just sore and shakin, arms ok, still can move my fangers and toes, Neck a little stiff but ok, it was already hurt before this last incident!!! I can still see, even if it's through a little blood and insulation, the ringing in my ears is still there, thank God, wouldnt want to lose that now!!!!! ALL SYSTEMS GO FOR POWER UP!!!
My beloved ran over to me, and almost started crying, "are you all right" she said!! OOOOOOO, I saw my chance, and if I played my cards right, I would never have to do any work around the house again! I kinda got a pittiful look on my face, one she could see plainly enough, and kinda bent a little at the waist, and said, "you know, I think I better sit a spell, until I get my bearings back, then I'll finish runnin this cable FOR YOU IN YOUR SEWING ROOM". Lay it on thick, tater, lay it on thick!!! Looked like Ferris Beuheler feining his illness!! My beloved heped me onto the couch, and broke out the first aid kit! wonder who put it away, that kit needs to be out and open at my house, every minute of every day!
Got my punkin haid fixed up, not enough to need stitches, but just a bandaid, and maybe a couple a moments of sympathy!!! Took all my old bloody and insulation permeated clothes off, and took a much needed hot shower! Meanwhile, my beloved called both boys, and they came over as fast as they could! After enquiring of my present health status, I limped over to the couch and layed down, "I'll be ok boys, just need to rest a while, then I will finish what I started, and start cleaning up the mess, and go to Home Depot and get some sheet rock and mud, and start patching the ceiling" moans ol sweet tater!!! "Thats ok, yall go on home, I can finish up here", oh, ole tater was a layin it on thick as peanut butter and honey!!!
"NO DAD", they both said, "you rest, and me and Kevin will clean it up and finish for you" Billy said!!! "Well, if you think thats what I should do" I said weakly!!! Well, them ol boys tore into that mess, and finished running the cable, and went to HD and got the necessary supplies, I did hand em my credit ccard, so they wouldnt have to be out any money cause I'm a idjit tater haid!!! Well, to make a long story even longer, they fixed it all up for me, being the good sons that they are!!! I milked that incident for quite a spell! My beloved would ask me to do something hard, like hang a picture, or move a piece of furniture, and I would say, "why sure sweety, here let me get up and do just that", and then kinda weave and stagger and groan and moan, until she would say, "oh you poor dear, you just lay there, and I'll do it"! I'm quite sure I coulda milked it for many many years, cept, she caught me jumpin on the bed!!! "SAY, YOU BIG FAKER, I THOUGHT YOU WAS INJURED" she exhorted! "WHY, IT'S A MIRACLE, PRAISE JESUS, I CAN WALK AGAIN" I said!!! Which promptly earned a pillow upside my idjit punkin haid!!!!
Ah, the trials and tribulations of bein a sweet tater!!!! So, Rich the lion hearted, that is how I came to use headlamps! that, and I installed, with help, lights in the attic so the sort of shennanigans that went on, wouldnt do so again!!!! The above story is varifiable through my beloved! I'm sure she would just as soon forget such goings on, but to quote a well know sailor man, "I YAM WHAT I YAM"!!!!
My primary care sawbones, I kinda keep him busy, and in bidness, with all my shenanigans!! Get lots o ads for first aid kits! You think they are trying to tell me something??? I've kinda slowed down some, knock on wood!!!
Ok, gotta get going!
Yall have a goot day and a better tomorrow. Keep them good thoughts coming in for Lola et al!!!
Your friend and sweet tater Beauregard, retired cable installer/phone man DOD
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